TVNZOPINION: I don't know where to start with how terrible this show is – in every single way. I thought this was going to be easy. Just another low-budget, misogynistic, catastrophe. Something I could really sit back and laugh at. But, instead, I got genuinely angry. It turns out that the "wife swap" part of this show isn't even the worst part. As I watched on, I was horrified to realise that the entire theme of the episode is pitting climate change and Judaism against each other. The premise of this show celebrates the ability to package your wife up – like the tangible object that she is – and then trade her in for a new one. Each wife rolls into the life of another man and his kids, then throughout the show, does all the things that a good wife should do. At the start of Thursday night's second episode, we're introduced to two wives. There's the eco-positive one with second-hand clothes and a gender-neutral haircut. Then there's the very religious (Jewish) one that's super into crossfit and definitely posts pixelated quotes on her Instagram feed. They probably have names, but that's not important because they're just wives. READ MORE: * Wife Swap NZ: A bizarre mix of nudge-nudge sexual innuendo and barefaced sexism * Diverse mix of couples revealed for Wife Swap New Zealand * Alex Behan revealed as narrator for Wife Swap NZ Every time I type the word "wives", it auto-corrects to "wolves" and I'm honestly so proud of my phone for that. The wives move into each other's houses and then proceed to do the following "wife" things: 1. Rummage through the fridge and determine what to cook for the family. This is challenging because one wife eats meat and uses plastic and the other doesn't. While each wife rummages, the husband leans over her and watches as she tries to guess what to cook for him and his spawn. The man must never cook. If a man cooks, it dies. 2. The wife then stays at home all day. Women and men are free to choose to do this as parents. I don't have children and I do have a limited word count, so I'm not going to get into it. What I will say is that a lot of companies are starting to offer equal paternity leave for fathers, in order to seriously combat the wage gap. I strongly recommend speaking with your employer about their policy on this and then urging them to update it, if it's lacking. If you don't understand how this combats the wage gap, it's because you need to learn more about the wage gap. 3. My favourite scene in this episode is when the crossfit/Jewish husband comes home and the eco-wife has not finished cooking dinner yet. He says, "but I'm hungry", and then stares at her, as if he literally doesn't know how to feed himself. The eco-wife ends up making him a sandwich. If you find yourself in this situation in real life, I strongly recommend suggesting your husband "makes his own b***** sandwich" – and divorcing him immediately. 4. The eco-mum teaches the children about the devastating impact of climate change and shows
